Havi Haiku

The dog started barking like crazy at, like, six this morning.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...Havi Haiku.

Shut the hell up, dog.
Why the fuck are you barking?
I'll throw you outside.


It's still dark outside.
Dear lord, why am I awake?
I will kill that dog.


I wake with a start.
It's too early to be up.
Motherfuckin' dog.


What is it, Havi?
Do you want to go outside?
Can't it fuckin' wait?


Snow blankets the yard.
Why is some of it moving?
Oh, that is the dog.


All she does is bark.
The slightest thing sets her off.
She is so nervous.

Everybody now, write a haiku. They're fun.


Angelkris said...

What are the parameters for a Haiku again? I forgot.

1031 said...

Three lines, five syllables, then seven, then five again.

mEg said...

I like it.

Ithiel said...

Warm Drink In My Cup
Chill Wind Blows 'Cross The Land
A Winter Morning Scene

Ithiel said...

All praise Wiki:

Haiku (俳句) is one of the most important forms of traditional Japanese poetry.

Haiku is a very short poetic form. Traditional Japanese haiku consisted of three lines of 5, 7, and 5 units each, which are generally applied as syllables, and contained a special word--the kigo--that indicated the season in which the haiku was set. Some consider that a haiku must also combine two different images, be written in present tense, have a focus on description and have a pause (the ''kireji'' or "cutting word") at the end of either the first or second line. All such rules are based in the Japanese language and literary tradition and are habitually broken by most poets, especially when adapted for languages other than Japanese (where they can seem arbitrary).

Few modern English haiku poets use the 5-7-5 ''syllables'' rule, which is often taught in schools. The 5-7-5 practice produces a haiku much longer than a traditionally composed haiku in Japanese, as the Japanese do not count syllables as they are defined in English, but instead count morae (singular mora), units of time. Morae are generally shorter than the average of English syllables which are highly variable in length. Today's English-language poets produce haiku in one of three ways:

# by using three (or fewer) lines of no more than 17 syllables in total;
# by using the concept of metrical feet rather than syllables. A haiku then becomes three lines of 2, 3, and 2 metrical feet, with a break or pause after the second or fifth;
# by using the "one deep breath" rule: take a deep breath and the reader should be able to read the haiku aloud without taking a second breath.

The haiku poet (''haijin'') writes about a moment in time, a brief experience that stands out. The traditional haiku poet is alsousually focused on nature.

Boston Jen said...

did you know that the Shema is a Haiku?

1031 said...

Hey, it is. I just counted it out on my fingers...that's kinda cool.

Ithiel said...

you red sea pedestrians and your Shema's all superior-like and stuff. oooh I have a haiku in my religion ooooh!

Oh yeah?! well here's another haiku!:

Ithiel Kicks Butt
He rocks so hard, oh yeah? yeah!
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

(nutin but <3)