10/31/2006

Happy Halloween!

::UPDATE:: 11:51 PM

Here is the story we workshopped in class today. It's kind of a continuation of this story, so maybe you should read that one first.

Also, here's the longer story I handed in today, a little more than six pages. The ending is a bit rushed, which I hope to change and expand in the coming weeks. Enjoy.

And, let me be among the first to extend a big congratulations to Rose & Johnny. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you will.

And thanks to everyone who called or emailed or MySpaced or texted (or even talked to me in person; how antiquated is that?) about my birthday. I felt ever-so popular, if only for a day. I appreciate your thinkin' of me in-between mouthfuls of candy.

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So. Another year gone, however many left to go. I always get introspective and slightly depressed around this time of year, for what I hope would be an obvious reason. I know life isn't a race or competition. At least, not one in which you're competing against other people. It's like golf, I suppose. You're not playing whoever you're partnered up with, you're playing the course. Life is the same way. It's not about other people and how well they're doing. It's about you. It's about how well you can play the course.

(Why no, I don't think that analogy was a bit of a stretch, why do you ask?)

It's not always enjoyable, being stuck inside my head. I think too much. Like today, for instance. I've been on campus since about 9:30 this morning and I'll be here til 9 tonight (unless we get out early; keep your fingers and toes crossed). Half the day is spent in class and the other half is spent here, in this computer lab, with only my internal, boring, musings on life for company.

At least I finished (sort of) the short story that was due today in my fiction writing class. I had started it yesterday morning, or early afternoon, before or after class, whenever. I got about a page and a paragraph done yesterday, so I only had about five pages to write this morning, in the two hours of work before class. And I got it done, though the ending is a bit rushed, and not really an ending at all, just a convenient place to stop for now. I'm going to come back to it. We have to revise one of our stories for the final paper in the class, extend it to maybe 12 pages or so, and I'm going to work on this one, I think. It's a story I've been wanting to write for a long time, and while these handfuls of pages certainly won't be the entire story, they'll be the start of it.

We workshopped the story I handed in last week today in class. Workshopping is, basically, you read your story aloud to the class, then you shut up and listen to them rip it apart. But that didn't happen today. I was surprised. Relieved, I suppose. There didn't seem to be too many flaws people cared enough about to point out, not even the instructor, so I took that as a good sign that maybe I don't entire suck. I don't think I have this particular story posted to the fiction blog yet. I'll check on that when I get home tonight, and I'll post the longer one I finished this morning, too, even though it'll be much better in about a month.

Getting older is...a non-event, really. I mean, I certainly don't feel older than I was yesterday. Age is but a number, right? Your age doesn't tell you, or anybody else, who you are.

And still, I look at my friends who have actual jobs and homes, marriages and kids, and I can't help but feel that I've fallen behind somewhere along the way. Which is silly, of course, and they would be among the first to say so, but I feel that way nonetheless.

It's not worth thinking about, I know. And I don't think about it often. Usually just today, and the days leading up to it. Trick or treat indeed.

Hope everyone has a safe and happy Halloween tonight. Be good.

3 comments:

Alissa said...

Sorry I couls only text you a happy birthday, stupid work. I know exactly how you feel. Every once and a while I look around at my friends or just other people in general and feel behind somehow, which like you said is silly, but its hard to not feel that way sometimes. But this is the path that we are on and there is nothing wrong with it. We are where we are supposed to be and can't compare our lives to others. And ever though I hate sports, I liked the golf analogy. We are playing the course, doing the best we can, and not playing the other people.

1031 said...

But we still get to play with other people, right?

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